Thinking About Leaving Your Church?

Why are so many people "fleeing" their churches?  Here are the top 10 reasons according to biblicalrecorder:


1. The church was not helping me to develop spiritually. (28%)
2. I did not feel engaged or involved in meaningful church work (20%)

3. Church members were judgmental of others (18%)
4. pastor was not a good preacher (16%)
5. Too many changes (16%)
6. Members seemed hypocritical (15%)
7. Church didn’t seem to be a place where God was at work (14%)
8. Church was run by a clique that discouraged involvement (14%)
9. Pastor was judgmental of others (14%)
10. Pastor seemed hypocritical (13%)

I wonder if you all notice how each of these are directed toward a common denominator of the MEISM syndrome.  Last time I checked, each person, being member of Christ's body, becomes the church as a whole. Are these valid reasons to leave a church?  It seems to me that the only reason to leave a church would be if and when the basic Biblical doctrine and teachings don't line up with the Word of God.  And, at that, God may not want you to leave!  If you know the truth and are walking in the grace and knowledge of God and He has placed you in a fellowship who's teachings doesn't line up with Scripture, God may want to use you to bring the light of the knowledge of Him.  The Apostle Paul shares (1 Cor 7) that the believing spouse should not leave the unbelieving spouse if the unbelieving spouse consents to live together.  "For, how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband?  Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let him walk." "Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace."  

People, we have to start looking at the eternal perspective of God's mighty work on the cross.  If you have entered into eternal life, hallelujah!  But, it doesn't stop with you.  God so loved the world, remember?  There are others beside you.  We are in a spiritual battle here, God's grace has reached us and we are now children of the kingdom of light, yet others remain in the kingdom of darkness.  It's hard work out there, but God is with us to give us strength.  We can do all things through Him who strengthens us.  We must be about our Father's business and answer the call to go and preach the good news to all mankind.  God asks, "Whom shall I send and, who will go for Us?"   Will you answer that call and say, "Here am I.  Send me!  I delight to do Your will, O God!"?  

People have complained about the leadership in churches and all the things they're doing wrong, yet, being a part of the church body, they don't want to take the responsibilities of getting their hands dirty and standing with that group of believers. If you see something you don't agree with, why does your attitude go straight to "them" vs. "us"?  All of a sudden you form a division and you break the unity of the body of Christ.  If God has given you the discernment that in the body where you fellowship things need to be improved upon, people are in sin, the spirit of God isn't moving, people are judgmental or hypocritical, you're not growing spiritually, pastor is a bad preacher, etc... you don't run!  It's not your duty to run!  You are the church!  You are lumped in the body!  You have a responsibility with that discernment God has given you, if indeed it is the truth.  So many times, you have to remember that the discontent comes from your own lack of spiritual maturity.  Pull out the log out of your own eye, so to speak, before you take the speck out of your brother's eye.  But, if indeed it is the truth and God has shined His light and made that known to you, it's not because He wants you to FLEE!  It's because He wants you to PRAY!  His Spirit wants to move and He wants to work in your life and everybody else's life.  His desire is to build up the body, to bring His bride from glory to glory, not to move them from one fellowship to another!  

Let's break it down here.  

1.) "The church was not helping me to develop spiritually."  First and foremost, apart from Jesus Himself, you are the first person responsible in your spiritual growth and development.  Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.  When you came to Christ in repentance and received Him as your Lord and Savior, was it not a personal experience in your heart?  God personally called you and you personally responded to that call.  Now as His child, why do you give the responsibility of your growth in Christ to a mere man when Jesus is the Author and Perfecter of your faith?  As a Christian, our growth in Christ comes from our personal relationship with Him, we can come boldly and draw near with confidence to the throne of grace. He is our only mediator, our great and high priest who can sympathize with us and who we can find mercy and grace in our time of need.  We will stand alone before Him and when we do, we will not be able to point our finger at the church as a whole, or any persons, and pass the blame.  We alone are responsible for our relationship with our Savior.  

2.)  "I did not feel engaged or involved in meaningful church work."  If you "did not feel engaged in", you're a lazy couch potato Christian who wants to be emotionally entertained and roused by emotionalism in your service to God.  It's not other's responsibility to engage you, though God knows many try!  If you feel you're not "involved in meaningful church work", then do something about it!  You're an adult, you don't need a babysitter or anyone to hold your hand!  You're part of the body, use the gifts God has given you.  If God has placed something in your heart to do, then do it!  Don't wait for an invitation.  God is your Master, not man.  Don't fear man, but fear God.  Listen to Him and do what He tells you.  Be an example that others may see your good works and glorify God!

3.) "Church members were judgmental of others".  What does this have to do with you?  If you see a wrong and you're not a part of it, pray.  We are brothers and sisters in Christ, adopted into His family.  We're a spiritual family, yet, we are still imperfect.  Just as a natural family quarrels, has disagreements, are judgmental and is learning to love one another, forgiving one another, we must do the same.  We must show grace to one another and forgive, and love.  God is teaching His children, just as He is teaching you, 'cause we know you're not perfect either.  We must learn patience as God is patient.  Pray and trust that God is at work in people's lives.  And don't judge others because God is changing them, so you may be judging them for what God has already worked out of them.

4.) "Pastor was not a good preacher".  Maybe not, but God is Sovereign in who He places in authority.  Be careful what you deem as "good".  Don't get caught up in emotionalism, but in whether or not the Word is being taught and if you have a teachable spirit.  Don't think of yourself more highly than you ought, and again, don't judge them.  If they're in err, speak up.  Be supportive, love your brother, encourage them, don't abandon them, they need you!  We're a family and we need to live in unity.  It's not about you, but where God has you and how you are able to be a good steward of your gifts in that fellowship.  Through love, serve one another.

5.) "Too many changes".  Geeeez!  Really?  Get over yourself.  Again, I guess I can't stress enough.  It's not about you, we're a family.  We have to learn how to love one another, support one another.  Do you seriously think that the Spirit of God decides to throw up His arms, fed-up with all these changes and would encourage you to leave?    Is it soo bad that God Himself is pushing you out the door?  You have to learn not to be so selfish, stop living for yourself and live for God by serving others.  If God calls you to leave, then it's for a reason and a purpose and through peace and obedience, leave, if not, stay, your work there is not finish.  

6,9,10.) "Members seemed hypocritical; Pastor was judgmental; Pastor seemed hypocritical." see #3 & pray.

7,8.) "Church didn't seem to be a place where God was at work; clique members discouraged involvement."  see #2 & pray.

If you're complaining, then you see yourself as a mature Christian who knows better.  And, if you consider yourself a mature Christian, then God has placed you in a battle and it's up to you to answer that call.  Just like Jesus, the Good Shepherd lays down His life for the sheep.  "He who is a hired hand, and not a shepherd, who is not the owner of the sheep, sees the wolf coming, and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them.  He flees because he is a hired hand and is not concerned about the sheep." John 10:11-13  So, in Christ, you are not a hired hand, but a shepherd.  Answer the call then, to feed His sheep.

People, the church has become about how they may be served by others and not about how they may serve God by serving others.  These are just about the silliest, immature reasons.  The Lord calls us to leave the elementary things behind.  We should be eating solid food by now, but we're still having to drink milk like babies. Don't be infant in your thinking, but in your thinking be mature! The Lord tells us to love Him and to love others.  By these two commandments we fulfill all the commandments.  Stop being so shallow and come to God and grow in the maturity to be found in Him.  Check yourselves whether you are walking in the truth.  Stop pointing your fingers at others, that is sin.  When God confronted Adam in the Garden of Eden, Adam blamed both Eve and God, saying, "That woman whom You had given me..."  God did not justify that answer.  Take responsibilities for your thoughts and your actions.  Live for God, not for yourself or for man.  Through love serve one another! "Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let him walk."  

Make No Provision

"But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts." Romans 13:14

Why shouldn't we make no (meaning: none, zero, nil, zilch, nada,  nicht, nein) provision for the flesh for what it lusts after?  Because, if we were honest with ourselves, we like it, we like it a lot!  We cry out our pitiful little cry, because the Spirit convicts us, "Oh, God, take this away from me!"  "I'm sorry, forgive me! I can't help myself!"  Really? Come on, you can help yourself, but you won't because you like it and you don't really want God to take it away either...it's nothing but lip service!  "You draw near with your mouth, but your heart is far from Me."  We get a certain something out of it or else, why would we do it? No one's making us do it, the devil can certainly press us, but in the end, our own will prevails.  Why?  Because we have set our minds on the things of the flesh!  


We do suffer from lusts, all of us.  I don't mean to say it's all about sex or anything, for lust comes in various forms.  The point is that it's whatever it is our own flesh lusts after.  Some may be in the form of control, drunkenness, the desire to be desired, pride, an adulterous heart, jealousy, envy, anger, power, money, fame, romance, etc...  We may struggle with a specific thing or a variety of things.  Left to our own, we would feed these things, but God calls us to the way of the Spirit.  "No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man, and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what is able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it."  God is faithful to provide a way.  We are unfaithful and we don't take the way out given to us most of the time.  We give in too easily.  If you set your mind on the things of the Spirit, you will live, for the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace.  If the mind is set on the flesh, it produces death.  But, God reminds us, we are now of the Spirit, so we have to set our mind on the things above where God is, and not on the things here below.


We have to take seriously that our flesh has cravings, so don't feed that monster!  We have to be about the Lord and His business.  We must flee from that which takes away from our devotion to God Almighty. "Do this, knowing the time, that it is already the hour for you to awaken from sleep; for now salvation is nearer to us than we have believed.  The night is almost gone, and the day is near."  We have to learn to look at the big picture of what lies before us.  We have to take our life seriously and live it knowing it's about the Spirit and less about the flesh.  "Therefore, let us lay aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.  Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy."  Seriously, we've already done these things, have we not?  Why live in them any longer?  What good have they done us?  Why not live to see fully what God has in mind, what God has planned according to His good and perfect will?  God calls us to live! Live!  Live! Why are we constantly choosing the way of death our flesh brings?      


We cannot make provision for that which will cause us harm.  We are no longer obligated to walk according to the flesh, we are obligated to walk according to the Spirit of God.  Therefore, "Awake, O' sleeper and arise from the dead and Christ will shine on you."  Wake up people!  Don't be unwise, but be wise and make the most of your time.  Don't be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is, that which is good and well-pleasing and perfect.  Put on the Lord Jesus Christ and live in His love, abide in His love, walk in His love.   Look up like Isaiah did and see the Lord sitting on a throne, lofty and exalted, with the train of His robe filling the temple!  When you do, you will  see the holiness of the Lord and be grieved and repent over choosing the lusts of your flesh.  For what does darkness have in common with the presence of Him who is holy?  Draw near to Him and He will draw near to you and darkness will flee.  And you will see Him and be radiant and your heart will tremble and be enlarged and rejoice!  And you will answer the call to be holy just as your heavenly Father is holy, to be an imitator of God as a beloved child, and walk in love, just as Christ loved you.  


He is seeking for us to worship Him in Spirit and in truth.  He calls us to turn from the ways of our flesh, to repent of the worthless deeds of darkness we have given worth contrary to the truth of who we are in Christ.  We are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation,  a people for God's own possession, so that we may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called us out of darkness into His marvelous light!  Act as free men then, for where the Spirit of God is there is liberty, and be bond-slaves of God!

Divided Heart

"What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you?  Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members?"  


The plain and simple fact is that when we are faced with an inner conflict, it's difficult to pin point what's going on.  We are left confused.  We vacillate from one thing to another and we are left more confused than ever before.  Usually, the longer we let it be that way, it becomes a tangled web in our hearts that at times we just don't know how to get ourselves out of.  So, we stay and leave things undone.  It's a mess that we live with and can't stand.  Some of us tend to hide from it or rather run away from it by distracting ourselves.  In truth, we are not honest enough with ourselves.  We allow the war to go on because we don't want to let go of that which we believe brings us pleasure.  The Lord jealously desires the Spirit which He has made to dwell in us.  God will not let you be okay with destructive habits or pleasures in your life.  

“In that you saw the feet and toes, partly of potter’s clay and partly of iron, it will be a divided kingdom...so some of the kingdom will be strong and part of it will be brittle.” Daniel 2:41-42

In your relationship with the Lord and in checking your heart, do you see your life in this verse?  Sometimes it gets so confusing why we don't have that satisfaction in Christ that Scripture talks about.  We wish we could have that joy of the Lord and that peace of God that surpasses all our understanding.  Sure, your salvation stands, you have a foundation that is laid that cannot be shaken.  You may also be doing all the nice things good little Christian children do.  But the Lord says He delights in loyalty rather than sacrifice and in the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings.  Is it any wonder then that parts of you are so brittle?  Why are you left striving, as if what you have and where you are are not enough? 

Just as clay and iron don't mix well together, it's time to be honest with yourself.  If you've received Christ as your Savior, you have passed from death into eternal life, you have moved from darkness into light, you are no longer living under the authority of the forces of darkness in this world, but have been adopted into God's holy family and sealed with His Holy Spirit as His child.  You are separated from this world, you are now a child of God and not a child of Satan.  Your allegiance is to God, not to anybody else, including yourself.  You have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer you who live, but Christ who lives in you, and the life which you now live in the flesh, you live by faith in the Son of God, who loved you and gave Himself up for you.  "But now that you have come to know God, or rather be known by God, how is it that you turn back again to the weak and worthless principles to which you desire to be enslaved all over again?" 

“Any kingdom divided against itself is laid waste and any city or house divided against itself will not stand.” Matthew 12:25

The Lord calls us to gather together with Him wholeheartedly, not partially.  If you want to live a life filled with both the kingdom of God and the kingdom of this world, it will not stand and you will reap what you sow.  For God's kingdom is the only kingdom that will not end, it will endure forever.  The Lord calls us to flee our adulterous ways and come home to Him, our Husband, our Maker.  You and the Lord knows what is dividing your heart, what it is that is causing you inner conflict and warring against your soul.  The Lord calls us to turn back, repent & bear fruit worthy of repentance.

Hear, O sons & daughters, the instruction of a Father and give attention that you may know understanding.  The Spirit God made to dwell in you is your Teacher.  Your ears will hear a word behind you, "This is the way, walk in it," whenever you turn to the right or to the left.  Listen to Him.  Defile your graven images overlaid with silver, and your molten images plated with gold.  Scatter them as an impure thing, and say to them, "Be gone!"  Then He, the Lord your God, will give you rain for the seed which you will sow in the ground, and bread from the yield of the ground, and it will be rich and plenteous!  

“He who is not with Me is against Me; and he who does not gather with Me scatters.” Matthew 12:30

Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.  Let all that you do be done in love.